🦝 I Want Your Mother To Be With Me It is a pity, that I can not participate in discussion now. It is not enough information. But this theme me very much interests.

Dear Dr. G., My absolute best friend sent me an article you wrote about a girl who had a mom who was the ”daughter” of the relationship. That article hit the nail on the head with my relationship with my mom. I love my mom with all my heart but it’s coming to a point in my life where I don’t want to talk to her because she has become such a negativity in my life. I’m not sure when or where or who it happened to first but it’s gotten to the point where I’ve become depressed and angry whenever I talk to her. I moved out to Los Angeles when I just turned 20 from a small town in NJ. It started around then, I think. I was living in a whole new world and going to college for my dreams. I was happy that I was finally able to have some independence and start my life the way I wanted. Then my mom started. First it was the end of the day phone calls, everyday saying ”Don’t forget to lock your door, I want to hear you lock it." And I would literally lock the door with the phone next to it. I had no problem at the time with this, if it gave my mom a sense of safeness for me then I figured it was OK. It got much worse after that. Over the next few years if I didn’t talk or text my mom on a daily basis she thought I was dead in a ditch somewhere. After I graduated college I wound up having to move back home for a while to get my head on straight and save money to move back to LA. I felt like a failure and cried often. My mom and I argued over everything and anything. It got so bad that my dad had to separate us one day. My parents are divorced but still close friends. My mom remarried. I understand that having a 23-year-old daughter living at home without a job hating her life can’t be easy, but she wasn’t making it easier. She would be so over the top with things it was crazy. I was afraid to tell her anything. She’s criticized me for sleeping too much then sleeping not enough. She was a hypocrite and said she wasn’t. It finally got to the point where I just felt like a failure and decided to take a big chance and apply for jobs in LA again. I asked a friend to stay on his couch until I got back on my feet and he said OK. Well, once I told her that she got even more neurotic and would get really quiet and just OK me to death on things. I told her the day I was leaving numerous times and when the day came she screamed at me for not telling her. But then she gives me her credit card in case I need something. Fast forward two months and I finally have a great job and I’m saving up to get my own apartment. My roommates and I went out for one of their birthdays and my phone had died on the way home. I have this iPhone app called find my friends and I figured again, as peace of mind hoping she would lay off me, to add my mom. It was 4 am PST when I got the text message asking where I was because find my friends said I was on the freeway and hadn’t moved. I was drunk and trying to sleep and told her I’m home on the couch sleeping. She called me a liar and said no you’re not. I said yes I am. Then we got into another argument with her ending it ”I’m calling the cops to make sure." Granted she didn’t but still that’s when I realized it was getting bad with her. If I didn’t immediately reply to a text message she would start with ”helllloooo?” And they’d get nastier until I got back to her. She’s start saying ”fine I guess you don’t want to talk to me. Bye." Fast forward almost a year and I finally have my first boyfriend. I was trying not to be rude and be on my phone all the time and so I’d leave it in my purse or just out of site when I would be with him. And again the hateful Facebook messages and statuses would start. If I didn’t talk to her for one day she wouldn’t sleep and the she’d get mad at me. Then I’d continue to ignore it hoping it would go away and she’d apologize. I’d talk to her and tell her how I felt and how my boyfriend would be a bit upset when I was constantly on my phone. It’s now gotten to the point where she keeps telling me she’s a bad mom and an asshole and all this self-hatred stuff. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t want to talk to her and if I say I that then she turns it around on me and starts a pity party. I love my mom but I can’t get it through to her that I’m an adult before she takes these drastic measures and says these hateful things. In fact as I wrote this I’m bawling my eyes out at work because of a text message she sent me saying this "Sorry I’ve disappointed you as a mom. You’re even now. You’ve broken my heart. You don’t have to talk with me anymore. I’m leaving jimmy taking my dogs and I’m gone. Life is one big f- up. You were right. I love you. Bye" Because I’ve been going through a rough time and just needed to talk about things. There is so much more to this and I appreciate any time you have spent reading this. I’m hoping to talk to someone soon who can maybe put our issues into a perspective that I can understand. An Exhausted Daughter Dear Daughter, I am really happy that you wrote to me. You have endured a very difficult set of behaviors for way too long. It sounds like you are extremely loving, patient, and flexible. It also seems quite clear that your mother has a difficult set of issues that are clearly impacting your relationship with her and how you feel in general. To me it sounds like there is some role confusion going on. Your mother appears to treat you like someone who should be taking care of her needs. The problem is that you are the daughter and she is the mother. Clearly, your mother has difficulty with emotional control, anxiety, and anger issues. Your mother does need to get therapeutic help. Perhaps her current husband can be encouraged to recommend this to her. I am reluctant to suggest that you recommend therapy to and for her because I am concerned that this will backfire and she will get angry with you. You can't please your mother. Nor can you predict how she is going to react to you. This must be crazy-making. I suggest that you decrease the frequency of contact that you have with your mother and that you set clear limits with her. If she becomes intensely emotional or critical on the phone then put an end to the interaction. There is no need to feel guilty about this. The hope is that by terminating the conversations she will understand that her harsh and critical behavior is unacceptable. Additionally, I would like you to feel like you have some control over your life and relationship with your mother. We get the mother that we get and sometimes we get a tough one. Please recognize that your mother has issues and limitations and despite this get on with the business of enjoying your life. Good luck to you. Dr. G. For more, visit my website.

Youwant your relationship with your mom to be about so much more than just weight, calories and numbers of almonds. Step 6. Lead by example. There’s a chance that your positive relationship with food will rub off onto your mom by her watching you. This will be a great outcome. If you’re learning to accept and respect your body – and diving into things like

Image AUGUST BRILL / FLICKR According to popular thought, where Christians go when they die is the same place they will spend eternity. But that's not what Scripture says. Revelation 211-4 tells us that after Christ's triumph at the end of the world, we'll live forever with him on the New Earth as resurrected beings. In the meantime, Christians go to be with Christ when they die. What an encouragement to know your mother is there with the Lord! My mom was one of the closest friends I've ever had, and she's been there for 23 years this week. I can't wait to see her again someday. Theologians call this place where our mothers now live "the intermediate heaven," and we learn a great deal about it from the apostle John's vision in Revelation 69-11 "I saw under the altar the souls of those who had been slain because of the word of God and the testimony they had maintained. They called out in a loud voice, 'How long, Sovereign Lord, holy and true, until you judge the inhabitants of the earth and avenge our blood?' Then each of them was given a white robe, and they were told to wait a little longer, until the number of their fellow servants and brothers who were to be killed as they had been was completed." Here we see that those in heaven are the same people—only relocated. There's continuity of identity from this life to the next. Your mother is now one of what Hebrews 1223 calls the "righteous men made perfect." Notice that the martyrs are aware of what happens on earth when they ask God, "How long … until you judge the inhabitants of the earth and avenge our blood?" They know those who killed them haven't yet been judged. They remember their lives on earth, even that they were murdered. Some say people in heaven can't remember or see life on earth because knowing of evil would diminish heaven's happiness. But the key to heaven's joy isn't ignorance; it's perspective drawn from living in the presence of Christ. For example, when called from heaven to the Transfiguration, Moses and Elijah "appeared in glorious splendor, talking with Jesus. They spoke about his departure, which he was about to bring to fulfillment at Jerusalem" Luke 931. They seemed fully aware of life on earth, and what God was about to do. Also consider this Christ referred to "rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents" Luke 157. Similarly, he said, "there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents" Luke 1510. It doesn't speak of rejoicing by the angels but in the presence of angels. Surely this includes saints in heaven, who would be overjoyed by human conversions, especially of those they knew and loved on earth. To rejoice, they must be aware of what is happening on earth—not generally, but specifically. Hebrews 121-2 tells us to "run with perseverance the race marked out for us." It evokes the image of Greek competitions watched by throngs of engrossed fans sitting high in ancient stadiums. The saints who've gone before us are called a "great cloud of witnesses." This imagery suggests those saints—veteran spiritual athletes—cheer us on from the great stadium of heaven. Note that the witnesses are said to "surround" us, not just to have preceded us. I believe Scripture clearly suggests your mother, who's now in heaven, is witnessing God's unfolding plan on earth. She lives in a place where joy is the air she breathes, and nothing she sees on earth can diminish that. If you're following Jesus, no doubt your mother is rejoicing over you. She's looking forward to your great reunion. In fact, when you enter heaven, I think she'll be among those right there with Jesus to give you a "rich welcome" 2 Peter 111. Randy Alcorn is the founder and director of Eternal Perspective Ministries and the author of 20 books, including Heaven Tyndale. He lives with his wife in Oregon. Copyright © 2005 by the author or Christianity Today/Today's Christian Woman magazine. Image by August Brill / Flickr Read more articles that highlight writing by Christian women at Can My Mother See Me From Heaven?

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There are plenty of ways mothers can express their love for their daughters — whether it be with gifts, hugs, matching tattoos, or maybe even by leaving her little notes with lovely quotes about daughters in inconspicuous every little girl has dreamed of being a mother, and a mother dreams of that same thing for her bond between a mom and her daughter is unlike any other, and these mother-daughter quotes perfectly describe that unconditional have even shown that the part of the brain that regulates emotions is very similar in the brains of a mother and daughter, even more so than a mother and son or a father and are so many ways mothers can express love to their daughters and show them just how much they are adored. And you don't always need to say the words out loud to express how you feel. It might include doing small acts of kindness, writing simple notes tucked into a pocket, or going out of your way to put your daughter's happiness daughter's joy means so much to a mother. And sharing quotes about daughters is the perfect way to spread that are role models and can spread this message of love to their daughters, who might one day share them with their own because it's the little things that matter most, these daughter quotes are sure to remind you of that very special, unbreakable Mother-Daughter Quotes1. "The woman who is my best friend, my teacher, my everything Mom." — Sandra Vischer2. "Angels are often disguised as daughters."3. "A mother and a daughter always share a special bond, which is engraved on their hearts."4. "A daughter is someone you laugh with, dream with, and love with all your heart."5. “A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future.”6. "One of the greatest gifts I’ve ever gotten is my daughter."7. "My mother shed her protective love down around me and without knowing why people sensed that I had value." — Maya Angelou8. "When someone asks you where you come from, the answer is your mother. It's so much more than love. Even when there's no love, it's so much more than anything else in your life." — Anna Quindlen, “One True Thing”9. "A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity, it dares all things and crushes down remorselessly all that stands in its path." — Agatha Christie10. "She's my best friend — she's everything to me. It's always just been me and her against the world." — Jacquelyn MiddletonRELATED 15 Beautiful Quotes That Show How Powerful The Mother-Daughter Bond IsQuotes About The Mother-Daughter Bond11. “My mother wanted me to be her wings, to fly as she never quite had the courage to do. I love her for that. I love the fact that she wanted to give birth to her own wings.” — Erica Jong12. "Mother and daughter from the start. Best friends forever from the heart."13. "I don’t want my children to follow in my footsteps. I want them to take the path next to me and go further than I could have ever dreamt possible."14. "As mothers and daughters, we are connected with one another. My mother is the bones of my spine, keeping me straight and true. She is my blood, making sure it runs rich and strong." — Kristin Hannah15. "Even as a small child, I understood that woman had secrets, and that some of these were only to be told to daughters. In this way we were bound together for eternity.” — Alice Hoffman, “The Dovekeepers”16. "Mothers and daughters together are a powerful force to be reckoned with." — Melia Keeton-Digby17. "My mother was my first country, the first place I ever lived." — Nayyirah Waheed18. "No daughter and mother ever live apart, no matter what the distance between them." — Christie Watson19. "I think the hardest thing for a mother is to make it possible for a child to be independent and at the same time let the child know how much you love her, how much you want to take care of her, and yet how truly essential it is for her to fly on her own." — Madeleine Albright20. "A mother and daughter's love is never separated." — Viola ShipmanRELATED 20 Gilmore Girls Quotes That Prove Lorelai & Rory Had The Best Mother-Daughter RelationshipInspirational Mother-Daughter Quotes21. “My mom is literally a part of me. You can’t say that about many people except relatives, and organ donors.” — Carrie Latet22. "When I'm weak and unpretty I know I'm beautiful and strong Because I see myself like my mother does." — Lauren Alaina23. "A mother is the only person in the world, who can turn a daughter’s worries and fears into happiness."24. “My daughter is my biggest achievement. She is a little star and my life has changed so much for the better since she came along.” — Denise Van Outen25. "Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart."26. “Little girls are the nicest things that happen to people. They are born with a little bit of angelshine about them, and though it wears thin sometimes there is always enough left to lasso your heart.” — Alan Beck27. "In my daughter's eyes I am a hero I am strong and wise and I know no fear But the truth is plain to see She was sent to rescue me." — Martina McBride28. "The love between a mother and a daughter is forever." — Patricia Wayant29. "To describe my mother would be to write about a hurricane in its perfect power. Or the climbing, falling colors of a rainbow." — Maya Angelou30. "One of the most important relationships we'll have is the relationship we have with our mothers." — Iyanla VanzantRELATED 50 Funny Mom Quotes31. “My highest hope for her is just that she has the fearlessness to always be her authentic self, no matter what she thinks men want her to be.” — Channing Tatum32. "You are my angel, you remind me of the goodness in this world and inspire me to be the greatest version of myself."33. "Your smile is charming, your laughter is infectious. You are a stunning woman and above all, you are my "To my daughter, never forget that I love you. Life is filled with hard times and good times. Learn from everything you can. Be the woman I know you can be. Love, Mom."35. “In my life, you are the sun that never fades and the moon that never wanes.”36. “Every moment I have had with my daughter is precious.” — Cathy Shaffer37. “From a little girl so very small, how and when did you get so tall?” — Karen Mortensen38. “You are my sun, my moon, and all of my stars.” — Cummings39. “Never forget that I love you. Life is filled with hard times and good times. Learn from everything you can. Be the woman I know you can be.”40. “You’re always with me, like a hand-print on my heart.”RELATED 35 Amazing Mother Daughter Tattoos You Never Knew You NeededFunny Mother-Daughter Quotes41. “The first lesson every child of Athena learned Mom was the best at everything, and you should never, ever suggest otherwise.” — Rick Riordan42. "A daughter is God’s way of saying he thought you could use a lifelong friend."43. “Life doesn’t come with a manual, it comes with a Mother.”44. "By the time you realize your mother was right, you have a daughter who thinks that you're wrong." — Sada Malhotra45. "Mother-daughter disagreements were, in hindsight, basically mother stating the truth and daughter taking her own sweet time coming around." — Barbara Delinsky46. “Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children!” — Sam Levenson47. "Our mothers always remain the strangest, craziest people we've ever met." — Marguerite Duras48. “A mom forgives us all our faults, not to mention one or two we don’t even have.” — Robert Brault49. “In the end, mothers are always right. No one else tells the truth.” — Randy Susan Meyers50. "If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?" — Milton BerleRELATED 55 Best National Daughter's Day Quotes And MemesShort Mother-Daughter Quotes51. "Maybe motherhood means honoring one's mother." — Sheila Heti52. "My greatest blessings call me mom."53. "A daughter is just a little girl who grows up to be your best friend."54. "You’ll always be with me, like a handprint on my heart."55. "Daughters are far more precious than Jewels."56. "A daughter is a miracle that never ceases to be miraculous."57. “For all the things my hands have held, the best by far is you.”58. "A mother is one to whom you hurry when you are troubled." — Emily Dickinson59. “Happiness is mother and daughter time.”60. “Motherhood is difficult and rewarding.” — Gloria EstefanRELATED World, Meet My Transgender DaughterMother To Daughter Quotes61. “I’ve never had a moment’s doubt. I love you. I believe in you completely. You are my dearest one. My reason for life.” — Ian McEwan62. "Someday when the pages of my life end, I know that you will be one of the most beautiful chapters."63. "No matter how old my daughter gets, she’ll always be my baby girl."64. “Having a little girl has been like following an old treasure map with the important paths torn away.” — Heather Gudenkauf65. "I did not give you the gift of life, life gave me the gift of you."66. “The most precious jewels you’ll ever have around your neck are the arms of your children.”67. “Becoming a mother forced me to have hope.” — Nefertiti Austin68. "Our daughters are the most precious of our treasures, the dearest possessions of our homes and the objects of our most watchful love." — Margaret E. Sangster69. "A daughter is a treasure and a cause of sleeplessness." — Ben Sirach70. "A daughter is one of the most beautiful gifts this world has to give." — Laurel AthertonDaughter-In-Law Quotes71. “When you have a wonderful mother-in-law who takes sides with you in squabbles with her own daughter — that's something.” — Lou Gehrig72. “The more a daughter knows the details of her mother’s life the stronger the daughter.” — Anita Diamant73. "I have never dreamt of having a better daughter than you. You made my life complete."74. “Family isn’t defined only by last names or by blood; it’s defined by commitment and by love.” — Dave Willis75. “The bond that links your true family is not one of blood, but of respect and joy in each other’s life.” — Richard Bach76. “Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.” — Oprah Winfrey77. “Being a mother is an attitude, not a biological relation.” — Robert A. Heinlein78. “Families don’t have to match. You don’t have to look like someone else to love them.” — Leigh Anne Tuohy79. “Thank you for being the answer to the prayer I hadn’t realized I asked for.” — Marisa DonnellyRelated Stories From YourTango80. “Daughter not by birth but by good fortune, I’m so lucky to have you in my life.”RELATED 6 Reasons Why Mothers And Daughters Fight So OftenQuotes For The Woman Who's Like Family81. “Courage, sacrifice, determination, commitment, toughness, heart, talent, guts. That’s what little girls are made of.” — Bethany Hamilton82. "I hope you believe in yourself as much as I believe in you."83. “And though she be but little, she is fierce.” — William Shakespeare84. “You are the woman who came into my life unexpectedly, whose presence kissed my soul.” — Marisa Donnelly85. “Thank you for caring. You don’t have to, but I sure am glad you do.” — Kasey Chatburn86. “You’re a very special lady, who showered me with love I am thankful for you as I’ve told God above.” — Charly Lester87. “Each day I give thanks for you and appreciate all that you do.” — Catherine Pulsifer88. “What sunshine is to flowers, and tides are to the sea, is nowhere as important you’re being in my life is to me.” — C. Stellar89. “At times our own light goes out and is rekindled by a spark from another person. Each of us has cause to think with deep gratitude of those who have lighted the flame within us.” — Albert Schweitzer90. “Mothers are like glue. Even when you can’t see them, they’re still holding the family together.” — Susan GaleRELATED 25 Powerful Quotes About Being A Single Parent Every Single Mom Can Relate ToQuotes About Being A Mother To A Daughter91. “We mothers are learning to mark our mothering success by our daughters’ lengthening flight.” — Letty Cottin Pogrebin92. “If you ever feel like giving up, just remember there is a little girl watching who wants to be just like you.”93. "A mother’s treasure is her daughter."94. “To my beautiful daughter, always remember you are brave, you are capable, you are pretty, and you can accomplish anything your heart desires! I know this because I am your mother.”95. “A daughter is a miracle that never ceases to be miraculous…full of beauty and forever beautiful…loving and caring and truly amazing.” — Deanna Beisser96. “You will always be the miracle that makes my life complete.”97. “Find it within you to love exactly who you are and to know you’re capable, you’re loved and you’re beautiful. The world is a better place, because of you. You are unique because there is only one of you.” — Shantel VanSanten98. “As they get older, our daughters become more and more like us too.” — Amy Newmark99. “Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart.” — "Winnie the Pooh"100. “A daughter is a day brightener and a heart warmer.”RELATED What Happened When My Daughter Told Me She’s Getting BoobsDaughter To Mother Quotes101. “The older I get, the more I see the power of that young woman, my mother.” — Sharon Olds102. "There were times when... I didn’t have a lot of friends. But my mom was always my friend. Always.” — Taylor Swift103. “A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary.” — Dorothy C. Fisher104. "My mom taught me a woman’s mind should be the most beautiful part of her.” — Sonya Teclai105. "My mother... she is beautiful, softened at the edges and tempered with a spine of steel. I want to grow old and be like her." — Jodi PicoultRELATED 15 Things I Teach My Daughter I Only Wish I'd Been Taught As A KidMore for You on YourTangoKaylee Dubois is a graphic designer and writer who covers astrology, pop culture and relationship up for YourTango's free newsletter!

Youmeet new people and want to tell them your story because maybe they understand. Keep Reading. Mother’s Day Magnifies the Loss of My Own Mom, and It’s Still Hard. In: Death of a Parent, Grief, Motherhood. by Kathleen Sullivan . Share “Your mother’s gone,” my dad said as he walked into our apartment. Those words still haunt me, even 19 years later. My mother’s death

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When I was a little girl I had a journal that someone had given me that was a record of my school experiences. It had a section for each elementary school year. It had places for my school pictures, class pictures, a pocket for my report card, places to list my favorite subjects, and my friends. Each year it also asked the question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" It had a blank line for me to fill in and I thought long and hard about this question every year. I think I filled in "teacher" multiple times, and I think I put "airline stewardess" once. One time I think I even put "dentist." It boggles my mind now, that I never once thought to put that I wanted to be a mother. You see, for as long as I can remember I have looked forward to motherhood. When I was young I couldn't wait to be a babysitter - the closest thing in my young mind to being a mother. After high school I attended BYU. A few weeks after the end of my 4th year at BYU, our first child was born. During that year of classes which I attended amidst morning sickness and other pregnancy related discomforts I received advice from numerous sources that I ought to finish up my degree after the baby arrived. After all, I had only one class and my student teaching left. But I had no desire for that. I had waited my whole life to be a mother and not even a college degree could entice me to give up one minute of raising my baby. My college years ended when he arrived. I have never felt that not finishing my degree was a sacrifice for me. I learned much at BYU and am so grateful for that experience. It helped me to grow up and prepared me to be a wife and mother. I have never in the last 21 years yearned to go back and finish. I consider my life raising and teaching 9 children to be the ultimate "student teaching" experience. I don't need a piece of paper or letters after my name to feel that I am in the midst of accomplishing something great. Yesterday I asked a couple of my daughters age 9 and 6 what they wanted to be when they grow up. Immediately, no prompting or prep they both chimed, "a mother." I was ecstatic. I am grateful that my example of a mother has been a good one. Even though mothering can be exhausting, frustrating, and difficult, I have truly tried to regularly express to my children how much joy being a mother brings me. I tell them often that I would not change my life and decision to be a mother for anything. Our daughters develop attitudes toward motherhood, good or bad, by watching us as mothers. Even as young as two, they are watching what we do. Earlier this summer I was at the playground with the children. I had our brand new baby in the Bjorn carrier to keep him out of the wind which was pretty wild that day. He was wide awake and I needed to be walking to keep him happy. I decided to walk around the sidewalk that goes around the perimeter of the park. It is a quarter mile long and you can see the whole sidewalk from the playground so I felt comfortable leaving everyone to play while I did so. On my second time around I looked back to see my little girl, age two, about halfway around the loop. She was carrying her baby doll, which she had insisted on putting in her little car seat and bringing to the park. After seeing my tiny little girl taking this big walk around this big sidewalk, I turned around to go back to meet her so we could walk together. She told me that she was taking her baby for a walk. She was truly in "mother" mode that day. She'd seen me walking with my baby I'd told her that I needed to walk with him to keep him happy and decided that her baby needed a walk to keep her happy as well. This same daughter regularly sits on a chair and "nurses" her dolls, and stands holding her baby, swaying back and forth the way I know she's seen me do countless times. These little ones really are observant! As Moms we need to be careful what they observe of our behavior and attitudes towards our mother and home duties. President David O. McKay said concerning the importance of motherhood “This ability and willingness properly to rear children, the gift to love, and eagerness, yes, longing to express it in soul development, make motherhood the noblest office or calling in the world. She who can paint a masterpiece or write a book that will influence millions deserves the admiration and the plaudits of mankind; but she who rears successfully a family of healthy, beautiful sons and daughters, whose influence will be felt through generations to come, whose immortal souls will exert an influence throughout the ages long after paintings shall have faded, and books and statues shall have decayed or shall have been destroyed, deserves the highest honor that man can give, and the choicest blessings of God. In her high duty and service to humanity, endowing with immortality eternal spirits, she is co-partner with the Creator himself.” Gospel Ideals, Salt Lake City Improvement Era, 1953, pp. 453–54.

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i want your mother to be with me